Shirley Solis is a mom who makes major strides in reaching out to personally connect with other women with her story, speaking and books. Whether a mom or a women lost in the ups and downs of life, Shirley inspires others to live a life of purpose and to rediscover themselves and their happiness.
What is a typical day for Shirley?
A typical day for me starts at 6:45am. I usually stay in bed and thank God for all the wonderful things in my life (health, family, friends). At 7:00am, I walk past the kitchen, drink a glass of water and sit in my home office- still in my pj’s, of course. I look at my to do list, check my email and schedule my social media posts for the day. Then, depending on the day, I create new videos or write content for my blog. I’m usually done with this by 9:30am, at which time my small children wake up. We have breakfast, do our morning chores (laundry, fast clean up) and start their homeschool work.
Our homeschool time includes workbooks and read aloud time. At 1:00pm we stop for lunch. Our lunch time is one of my favorite times, because my older boys (who are also home and doing independent work) join the rest of the family and we laugh and talk about life. I keep lunch very easy and everyone prepares what they want- fruit, sandwich, smoothie.
In the afternoon, I continue with work for about 3 more hours- (coaching calls, JV partnerships, create new products), except for Mondays, that is our family cleaning day. In the evening, I prepare dinner, catch up with laundry, personal study time, maybe a family movie, date with hubby or my exercise favorite…Zumba class! I am usually in bed by 10:30pm and spend some time reading, journaling or listening to my favorite podcasts.
You mention in your bio, about a time you lost yourself in the midst of the living. What areas of YOU have you focused on since, to discover and improve what was missing from the wife, mother
and business owner path of your life and pinpoint what was not fulfilling? What is different now?
Becoming a mother was the most wonderful experience ever, but I must say nobody told me there was a possibility that I could easily forget other important roles in my life. Always pregnant or breastfeeding, I used to pick up my hair in a ponytail and wear “mom” approved clothes. Unfortunately, this not only affected me, but my marriage as well.
Identifying with my role of being a mother, it was very hard to identify with the other roles inside of me. Since then, I’ve learned that I am first and foremost a beautiful woman, who HAS FUNCTIONS OR ROLES. These functions (wife, mother, business owner, daughter, friend) are a part of me, but they are not all of me. I nurture the beautiful woman and let my functions feed off of my main identity.
I’ve focused on discovering the woman- what does she like? what keeps her going? what hurts her? what colors, textures, flavors does she like? what music does her body move to? I give myself permission to explore without inhibition and to live a life lead by God on our terms.
You mention a struggling marriage being one of the boulders in your path. What is one tip you would give to wives who may have checked out on their marriages trying to be the DO IT ALL woman?
I believe all women are extremely powerful and with the possibility to birth and give life to ideas, thoughts, trends, etc.,…and because of pain in life, we often become very independent. This independent spirit causes a breakage in marriage. I would encourage married women to make sure they are tending to their heart, not holding on to bitterness and learning healthy boundaries in marriage. I think the most important thing a married woman can do is work on her overall emotional health in order to live so joyfully and radiantly that by example she will influence her husband and inspire him to live according to his purpose.
Tell us about your childhood and did you see your mother taking on the same roles and do you think that played a part in how you initially weighed yourself down?
My parents were divorced by the time I was 2 years old.
Unfortunately, my dad was absent from my life and that caused a deep void for many years. In turn, my mother was “mother and father,” which meant she had to be very tough to make it in a foreign country with two young children. She always had 2 jobs and nobody to turn to. She had to be TOUGH. I learned to be tough and to fight through life. “Hit if life hits you. Work and work harder. Don’t let any man rule you.” As a result, I learned to take on responsibilities that were not my own. I did not learn to love myself or appreciate the jewel I am.
Today I recognize that many of the problems I experienced in marriage came from what was modeled to me either by my mom or in society. Thankfully, I understood I have choices and could change things for good. In fact, one of my life purposes is teaching parents to heal their own childhood wounds, so they will not repeat the mistakes their parents made.
How do you replenish your creativity and treat and reward yourself from your daily duties?
Because I had “lost myself,” I had to work extra hard in getting to know who I am and what I need. Therefore, I have become very good at knowing what I need when. My personal treats include eating Chocolate Chocolate Chip Ice Cream from Haagen Dazs, Passion Fruit tea, reading a book, taking Zumba class, spending time with friends, going on a date with my husband, watching a movie ALONE, or smothering my body with essential oils. All these treats serve to take care of ME and help me gain new energy to keep exploring life!
Tell about your current businesses, being a Transformational Life Speaker and your Author endeavors (books). What inspired you to do a cookbook? What is the basic message in your
speaking?
I love sharing my message with large audiences of people. People will often say they feel like they are sitting in my living room, rather than in the audience- I love that! I am a Personal Public Speaker, rather than a Professional Public Speaker. I think the difference is that being personal and vulnerable leads to the transformation of others through stories that inspire, educate and connect.
My basic message to women is they are more powerful than they know- Life has beat them down emotionally and it has given them more than they could handle, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Each woman can reconcile with God, herself and others and bring healing and radiance and life to everything and everyone around her- starting with her family!
Through my speaking and online courses, I look to provide tools for women to live a physically, emotionally and spiritually healthy life…that will then carry over to building intimate marriages and strong families, who will live with purpose, passion and contribution!
Tell us about your cookbook and other written works.
I never imagined my first published work was going to be a cookbook! I hated cooking, LOL!! This book was actually born out of my passion for people and cultures. When my family traveled around the US in our motorhome, people we met always thought we were Mexican, because of our dark hair and skin. We were asked “do you speak Mexican?” So, I determined to share my Hispanic heritage through food. After all, food is the best way to introduce a culture to people, right?
Not Just Tacos is a journey into the world of authentic Latin American cuisine. With beautiful images and easy to find ingredients, readers learn to cook two or three of the most popular dishes in each Latin American country! Not Just Tacos became an Amazon best-seller and has been a family favorite since day one!
I also created two online courses- Building Character with Children and The Youngpreneur Program. These courses give parents direction to lead their family and to raise children of character and entrepreneurship, respectively. The Building Character program offers families a vision and a plan, as well as practical skills to gain obedience and loving relationships with their young children and teens. In this course, I also teach parents the root of why they can’t change their bad parenting habits, but often can’t. I created The Youngpreneur Program with my 17 and 15 year old sons, who love business! It’s been fun working alongside them to teach other teens to start their own business!
What is the last good book you read?
I last read Barbara Corcoran’s Use What You’ve Got & Other Business Lessons I Learned from My Mom- highly recommend it!!! As a mom, I could appreciate the wisdom Barbara’s mom gave her. Moms seldom see their value and how their input can change their children’s life!
Pick one (or be creative) Spa Day with your girlfriends or Amusement park with the family?
LOL!! I think a woman can have it all…so, I am going to say that I pay for all our best friend families to join the Solis gang on an all inclusive family resort in Cancun, Mexico. There we spend time with the hubby, with the kids and just the girls! (this is in my bucket list, by the way)
If your life story could be described in three colors what colors would they be and what stages of your life does each represent?
Black, White, Rainbow (sorry, the last is lots of colors, but it is what it is).
Black represents the first 34 years of my life. It wasn’t bad, but it was definitely lacking light. Then came a time of purity and learning to be a light in this world and now I am in a multi-color season that will never end- red, green, orange, yellow, purple, turquoise!!!
You mention wanting to be an astronaut as a child. If you had the opportunity now to travel to the moon and could only take 5 items, what would you take (not including basic essentials like
food etc.)
I would bring essential oils, tea, beautiful china, an iPad with wifi to download all the books I want and a Bose speaker to play tons of music!
Tell our readers how they can get in contact with you.
I would love to stay in touch with you! Really!! Visit me in my home on the web, ShirleySolis.com Make sure to watch my video with a welcome message just for you and to grab a FREE copy of my cookbook (I pay for the book and you cover shipping and handling) and my FREE Parenting mini-course. I want to be long time friends and treat you like family!
Be sure to visit Shirley’s website for more info on her books and endeavors.
