If you asked a group of your friends, who cheats more-men or women, you would probably get more men selections. However, its not always true. Women cheat too. And sometimes more often. While the reasons may vary- men may not even need a reason and women are more tied to their emotions- at the end of the day women are just as guilty.
She Did What?
Recently two of my favorite TV shows, HBO’s Insecure starring Issa Rae and BET’s Being Mary Jane starring Gabrielle Union both touched on the cheating woman. Issa Rae’s character, aptly named Issa also, cheated on her long term live-in boyfriend Lawrence while Gabrielle Union’s character Mary Jane cheated on her serious boyfriend Lee,with a co-worker while her mother then stepped out on her father for an old flame who showed up in town.
The dynamics that this created is the very same we see when the roles are reversed. Trust me, I’ve been cheated on and while I have never cheated as an adult I clearly know people who have- of both sexes and I know the many varied ways these situations can play out. And I have never cheated not because I’m special but because I am more of the “leave if I’m not happy enough to stay faithful” type so before I cheat I would just breakup with someone.
From the period of wondering if they can get past it and move on, or perhaps one walking away immediately, hurt people tend to react the same no matter the sex. From the shame of actually wanted to stay after being cheated on or the distrust that remains after moving forward- everyone’s emotions are all over the place.
Check out KevOnStages hilarious take on how he would handle his wife cheating on him.
On Insecure for example, Issa began to sleep around. Lawrence did too and then was upset to see Issa “hanging” with the guy that she cheated on him with. While they seemed unclear on what they were going to do, Lawrence was very clear on not going back once he saw her with the “third party”. That is one thing I notice even in the real world. Men are less likely to forgive a cheater. Men struggle with moving past it.
Like some internet memes often point out, a man can cheat a million times and have an expectation to be forgiven but if you have lunch with a male co-worker, he is in the fetal position for three days. Double standard much? On the other hand on Being Mary Jane, Mary Jane cheated with someone who basically appeared more exciting and whom she had a more heated connection with while her mother had unresolved feelings for the man she gave up to “marry safe” so many years ago. She risked decades of marriage for one night of “I never got closure” sex.
They writers hit the nail on the head once again when once her husband found out instead of him leaving her, which is what she thought the suitcases by the door meant, he in turn asked her to leave their home. Talk about role reversal!
Have you ever cheated? Have the roles been reversed from what many consider the “norm”? Name a favorite movie or TV show that broke the code and highlighted the woman cheating on the man below!
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